“Do you know anything of yonder fire?” “Yes: I do know it is a fire.” Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian audience would do for the authentic 1840s coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our […]

Our most blasphemous episode yet! Learn all about the Christmas mistletoe decorating tradition that is definitely Victorian, probably Georgian, and almost certainly not medieval.

An alternative to the more practical kerosene hurricane lamps—and more properly called parlour lamps or chamber lamps—it’ll take more than a stiff breeze to knock these 19th century marvels over. But what are they, really? And where did they come from? Who sent them? What do they want? Plus, Dee’s true feelings on Fenton.

Our friends Abracadaniel and Jon (from our Magic: the Gathering episode!) rejoin us for a thrilling chapter which the author claims will contain THE DESTRUCTION OF SIR FRANCIS VARNEY'S HOUSE BY FIRE. —THE ARRIVAL OF THE MILITARY, AND A SECOND MOB. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week […]

The tail twitches and the eyes slide side-to-side as time slips by… Join us for a dip into the wild and wonderful world of mid-century kitsch with Kit-Cat Clocks!

Our friend Tarra (who is definitely not a vampire) returns to tackle the fifty-second chapter of Varney the Vampire, wherein the chapter title promises The Interview Between the Mob and Sir Francis Varney, the Mysterious Disappearance, and the Wine Cellars. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just […]

How does advice to incoming university students fare after over a hundred years? (Content Warning for irreverent discussion of historical hazing deaths.)

“Furthermore, the circus strongman must be destroyed.” – Cato the Elder, probably.

The attack upon the vampyre's house, the story of the attack, the forcing of the doors, and the struggle! Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian audience would do for the authentic 1840s coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters […]

Maximize your car-per-car with our macro episode on Micro Machines!

What did it take to be a good wife by the standards of 1930s America, as set forth by George W. Crane (Ph.D., M.D.), cofounder of the Scientific Marriage Foundation? Does an Antiques Freak pass the test? Tune in to find out! (And thanks to Sahrall on the Patron exclusive Antiques Freaks Friends Discord for […]

A cunning plan is crafted and foiled in this, the fiftieth chapter of Varney the Vampire! Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian audience would do for the authentic 1840s coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out […]

Not just for hipster cold brew. Not just for farmhouse chic. There is so much more to Mason and the Ball Brothers. Tune in to learn all.

Our friend Olivia rejoins us for another thrilling chapter of Varney the Vampire! Check out Olivia's short speculative fiction, novels, and essays at ofcieri.com Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian audience would do for the authentic 1840s coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock […]

Just a quick lil dip into the history of Victorian medicine. What could go wrong?

What did it take to be a good husband by the standards of 1930s America, as set forth by George W. Crane (Ph.D., M.D.), cofounder of the Scientific Marriage Foundation? Does an Antiques Freak pass the test? Tune in to find out! (And thanks to Sahrall on the Patron exclusive Antiques Freaks Friends Discord for […]

Our friend James Wake returns to tackle yet another chapter in the hefty tome of Varney the Vampire – The Stake and the Dead Body. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s coffeehouse experience. […]

Enamel where? Enamel here! This week we renew our feud with Martha Stewart and discuss everything there is to know about this trendy and oft-reproduced form of metal and glass design.

Listen. We’re all aware that we as a society really whiffed it on Funko Pops. And Beanie Babies. And tulip bulbs. But surely, surely this time is different! Surely this is the collectible that doubles as a safe investment opportunity! Surely this designer art toy turned commercialized customization machine is just as good as cash […]

Our friends Abracadaniel and Jon (from our Magic: the Gathering episode) join us for another thrilling chapter of Varney the Vampire. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock […]